Miss Tiffany, a Good Son

By William Sparrow

Although still old fashioned in many ways, Thai society has long accepted - even embraced - its lesbian, bisexual, gay and transgendered (LBGT) communities.

And unlike many Western or allegedly more modern nations, Thais rarely discriminate or ridicule. People who have chosen alternative lifestyles are acknowledged, some might say cherished, by their country. This is the story of one such Thai.

In yet another crowning achievement for the LBGT set, 21-year-old Kangsadarn Wongdusadeekul, better known as Nong Noeng, was last month crowned Thailand's Miss Tiffany - the title bestowed on the kingdom's most beautiful and elegant male-to-female transvestite, transsexual or transgendered woman.

The 2008 Miss Tiffany pageant, now in its 11th year, was held in the boisterous seaside resort city of Pattaya, some 150 kilometers southeast of Bangkok. The 30-contestant competition, held at the Tiffany Cabaret, was spilling over with more than 2,000 spectators anxious to applaud the winner.

Cameras flashed, the crowd roared and feminine beauty shone bright. Days later the pageant was broadcast on prime time Thai TV, drawing millions of viewers. And it was Nong Noeng, demure and articulate, who stole the show.

"My family never stood in the way of me trying or wanting to live as a female even when I was young. But it was harder for them then. Time has made it easier for them to accept my lifestyle as a ladyboy," she told Asia Times Online in an exclusive interview, using the word commonly used in Thailand to describe people such as her. "They see me as a good son, no matter what."

Nong Noeng grew up in a military household, but even in a strict environment found acceptance. When it came time to enter the Miss Tiffany pageant she sought the advice of her mother. "She said 'Are you sure? Do you think you can compete with the other guys?'" said Nong Noeng, who also took home 100,000 baht (US$3,200)and a brand new Honda sedan. "I was more excited than nervous and I was very happy that I decided to do the pageant."

Although her mother was eventually supportive, Nong Noeng is quick to note the impact her victory has had on her family. Sure, Thailand has less social stigmas than other countries, but becoming a national - even international - symbol of transgendered beauty has been a daunting experience for all involved.

"Everyone thought I was a real girl before Miss Tiffany, but after that everybody knew me as I am, a ladyboy," she told Agence France Presse in a post-pageant press conference.

Nong Noeng, a first-year mass communications student at Dhurakij Pundit International College in the capital Bangkok now moves on as Thailand's representative at the 2008 Miss Queen International, also to be held at Tiffany's Cabaret in Pattaya. And even if some may view her as a pioneer in LBGT openness and pride, she has more pressing matters at hand - not the least of which are her duties as model, presenter and tourist ambassador for Thailand and Pattaya.

"I am very excited about the Miss Queen International. I have been shopping, looking at dresses and working on my English language skills, not only for the pageant, but also to help me in my studies," Nong Noeng told Asia Times Online.

This is Nong Noeng, who in another culture or time may have found it impossible to be the light-hearted young Thai woman she is today. Still, she's not afraid to tackle the serious issues that come with an LBGT lifestyle.

For one, she's candid on Thailand's world-renowned transgender and gender re-assignment surgeries. Thai surgeons are among the best in the field and are often called on by Western doctors for insight and guidance. The domestic professionalism, as well as a booming medical tourism trade, have been a direct result of Thailand's acceptance of alternative lifestyles. Nong Noeng doesn't want to miss out.

"I haven't had [gender re-assignment surgery] yet, but I do plan to. I hope to be able to have the surgery soon after the Miss Queen International competition," she said.

And it was Nong Noeng's comments on Thailand's mandatory conscription for males - based on a lottery and sexuality at birth - that brought down the house during the Miss Tiffany question-and-answer section. Asked "whether she would be happy to join as a man", she drew guffaws and applause by responding: "Last year, I went to register as a soldier but my figure had changed, so the government did not let me. We are beautiful - so we don't need to be soldiers."

In fact, the government seems to agree. In March, Thailand adjusted its military law that had said transvestites were too "mentally disturbed" to serve to less harsh wording that recognizes their status and exempts them from service. And just this week, British newspaper The Telegraph reported that a Thai school had built a "transvestite toilet" after 200 students said they considered themselves to be transgender.

Such young people should listen to Nong Noeng: "Everything is up to the individual themselves. Me and women like me can be good or bad examples. I want to say to young people that if you want or feel you need to live this type of lifestyle, then you need to be good to yourself and those around you. This will help family, friends and society accept you for what you are."

Nong Noeng has won her competition and women and men like her share the victory. Nong Noeng, and also Thai society, are helping to define and accept alternative sexualities at home and across the world. For this, she should be celebrated - just as Thailand does - as a woman willing to push the limits of gender rights, equality and, ultimately, freedom.

See Asian Sex Gazette ( http://www.asiansexgazette.com ), where William Sparrow serves as contributing editor, for a wide range of news on currently lifestyle, health and social issues of human sexuality in Asia.

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